Today's

The Internets is filled with stuff, so much stuff it seems like a job just to keep up with it all. Here at Super-Id, we like to keep it simple – one thing, whether it’s a photo, video, song, or whatever, they we think you should fucks with. We call it Today’s…

Jennifer Lopez “Booty” Ft. Iggy Azalea

Jennifer Lopez
It finally happened. In a world where music videos are only relevant to human beings who have to show their student ID to get inside a people, the general public was treated to a teaser video for Jennifer Lopez’s single, “Booty” from her double-brick album A.K.A. To have the audacity to teaser a music video means that you are either entirely full of yourself, completely out of touch, on crack, or possibly maybe in ownership of something that will move the needle. The prospect of seeing Jennifer Lopez’s and Iggy Azalea’s ass on full display empowered the powers that be at the record label. I’ll bite…

  1. At the time of writing this post, there are 62,675 Likes and 24,470 Dislikes. Eek! Eek! Eek!
  2. Hype Williams directed the video, which means there is a strong likelihood you may catch a seizure from all the quick cuts and strobe light effect.
  3. What happened to Jennifer Lopez’s ass? That shit used to be huge. I’m going to blame her kids, since kids ruin damn near everything.
  4. I made the mistake of watching the video with the volume on. I may regret for the next six months or so, when I recognize the song playing on the radio 30x a day, despite it being a unabashedly terrible song.
  5. Can’t figure out Iggy Azalea. White Australian who raps Southern. Spielberg couldn’t make that up.
  6. This song reeks of desperation and a desire for relevancy. JLo should have made the record her first album, not her 8th. Nor after her two kids. Remember, kids ruin everything, especially the ass.
  7. Was Nicki Minaj not available for this record?
  8. This whole experience was a letdown. It felt like Godzilla. You knew it was coming out. You knew you were going to see it the day off. You sat through the whole thing. You walked away wondering what the fuck you just watched it. You liked it because you felt you had to like it despite not really liking or disliking it. It was just there. You’re going to watch it again, partly out of some sense of pop culture obligation, and partly you want to make sure you understood what you just watched. And the truth is you want to like it, so you’re willing to give it another shot.
  9. I felt that Jennifer Lopez’s “Booty” was kind of demeaning towards women. I FELT THAT! ME! You know shit is off when I am concerned about depicting women in a negative light.
  10. Sad. Cause we like JLo. Word.

So the net result is when you tease something nowadays, it’s just going to disappoint. The air of expectation is way to large, and apparently larger than the combined bootyliciousness of Jennifer Lopez and Iggy Azalea’s ass. I fucking can’t believe I just used to word ‘bootyliciousness.’

 

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