Stormi Maya “Blonde”

Stormi Maya Presented by

Stormi Maya don’t party. Stormi Maya don’t eat meat. Stormi Maya don’t do drugs. Stormi Maya don’t drink. Stormi Maya will tell you all about this. Not gonna lie… it’s a bit annoying, but what Stormi does do that we actually love is be sexy as fuck and free as hell. After all the speeches about veganism etc., Stormi is a dead sexy girl that has a rabid aversion to being dressed. She don’t like clothes in general is what we are saying here… Not mad really.
I think Angrymoon has shot Stormi in the studio three times. It’s oily nakedness every single time… obviously. This goes without saying, but what we like about Stormi (again, after all the speeches about health and her basically being against anything that Angrymoon considers fun) is that this girl will go to the mat for a good shot or good video. She loves being shot and it shows. We have videos of her that can never be posted because they are too sexy (and if anyone saw them, no one on our squad could ever run for president or any public office for that matter) and that’s another thing; sometimes we have to reel her in. Her energy on set once the flash bulbs are going off is electric and infectious. Sometimes it’s best to just let her do her thing and see what comes of it.
Oh yeah… something about her nipples (this is a keepin’ it real moment right now). They always slip out of whatever she is wearing. In general, as men, we don’t have a problem with this, but on a photoshoot level, it sometimes gets problematic [Editor’s Note: especially for The Super-Id as we are a PG-13 online publication that likes to go PG-13 ½ when it comes to nakedness] Stormi insists loudly and often that she can’t help it, but we thinks the lady doth protests too much if you know what we’re sayin’.
[Editor’s Note: I was at work (yes, I have a day job as Super-Id isn’t quite yet the say-all, be-all that it will be in my life), when Angrymoon sent me a text with a picture of a ¾ naked women in the studio with the message telling me to come over. I did everything in my power to finish working on the multimillion dollar campaign I was assigned to (not bragging at all, just illustrating how important naked women are in the construct of my life) and get to the studio. Once I got there, I wasn’t prepared for the sheer lunacy that was underfoot.

Often times when you shoot a model, there can be a certain degree of tension. Good tension. Sexual tension. Tension is good and often leads to great art. When I got to the Stormi Maya shoot (only been to one of the three Stormi Maya/Angrymoon shoots), there was tension. It was bad tension. Or that’s what it appeared to be. Angrymoon was telling Stormi she can leave whenever she wants to. Stormi kept talking about leaving, but she wasn’t getting up and going anywhere. She was laying on the floor in various positions and poses as Angrymoon kept snapping pictures. I wasn’t sure what the fuck was going on. Still don’t. Were they playing? Were they fighting? Was she going to call the cops or was Angrymoon going to call the cops? She was laughing and not quite crying, but I can’t think of the word to describe the opposite of laughing, but not quite crying. It was strange. Very strange. So we did the only thing we could think of – we shot video.

Last thing – Angrymoon wasn’t lying about Stormi’s nipples. They are omnipresent. They make their presence known at all times. Always at attention. Always poking out. No complaints. No complaints at all. This is Stormi Maya’s world and we are just living in it.]





7 Responses

  1. Jake

    You sound fucking stupid. Try to speak English you fucking idiot . When you say stormi maya don’t .. You lower the standards and standards of everyone reading your work. You are a complete fool .. Just because the masses talk like a fucking idiots you don’t have to

    • Sigmund Freud

      Greetings Jake,

      The fact that you are replying indicates that English was being spoken, otherwise you wouldn’t have understood the message, so on that front, we’ve succeeded in our mission.

      If we are discussing English and standards, please note, the proper way to structure your sentence would be to put quotes around ‘storm maya don’t…’ to indicate you are directly quoting us. Plus you used two periods instead of the proper three periods of an ellipsis. So it appears your English speaking standards are as low as the ones you accuse us of having. Jake, that is called irony.

      Lastly, it bears noting, who is the bigger fool? Us for writing like ‘fucking idiots’ (please note the use of proper use quotes!), you for understanding our ‘masses talk’ despite yourself, or you for caring enough to take the time to comment and complain about it?

      Thank you for taking the time to comment. Please come again.


      • djbango

        Lol. I am afraid to leave a comment unless I run it through Microsoft Word to check for mistakes. On that note, how can I get access to the behind the scene videos.

      • Like

        Wow I just read this and I’m so stunned that you have a Brain. You sound like you jerkoff in your moms basement thinking about this slut Stormi maya.. Get a life and move out of your moms house. Or just jump from a tall building it will be over quick ..

      • Freud

        Did you just get out of prison or are you 12 years old? “You sound like your jerk off in your moms basement…” And “get a life and move out of your moms house.” The topper was “just jump from a tall building…” That one got the whole office laughing. Never have we received sadder insults.

        Here are some more online insults for you to use as you troll online:
        “Go talk a long walk off a short pier.”
        “Eat shit and die.”
        “Kill yourself.”
        “Sit on it.”

        Luke. Thank you for your comment and your visit. And we hope that you are still able to bypass the parental restrictions on your parents’ account and visit us some more. We appreciate the traffic. And since you are so obsessed with mother’s, be sure to send our best to your mom. We take submissions here. Tell her to send us a selfie.

  2. Lol

    Really lol this whole thing is a joke I assume. Stormi maya is a slut and that’s not a bad thing but with all the porn sites online she’s just a whore in a world of whores

    • Freud

      Hi Luke,
      Hi Luke’s Friend,

      We would be surprised by both of your comments, but then we saw that you are from Massachusetts, so it all made sense. The entire state of Massachusetts exists under an invisible bridge making it a haven for trolls and other subhumans.

      Enjoy that troglodyte life in and around the Bah-ston area.


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